True Healing in the Washing of Forgiveness

I have this seed of unforgiveness that so quickly becomes a deep, embedded root of hurt and bitterness.

Every time I feel I can move on, that I've healed, that all is well, I'm reminded of the pain still lurking.

Second Kings tell of Naaman, a highly respected general for Syria.  At a time where leprosy was a sentence of death and shame, the Lord inflicts him with open sores.

So he heads to Samaria, seeking out healing.  In faith, because of his young servant girl's words, with his flesh falling off, he calls on God to be healed.  The same as I, over and over fall onto His mercies.

For Naaman, the healing wasn't what he expected or even thought he deserved.  His words when he was sent to Elisha and Elisha wouldn't even come meet him were, "Behold, I thought that he would surely come out to me and stand and call upon the name of the Lord his God, and wave his hand over the place and cure the leper."

Oh how those words resound with familiarity.    This, this is what I long for; a swish of God's mighty, magical wand and all is fixed.  My heart bound, my wounds healed.  The scars no longer visible.

The Lord gently reminds me He is not my genie.  And He is far more concerned about my eternity than my temporary.  I might just be asked to walk through a raging river.  A filthy river.  A river where I can't see my feet and don't know what is lurking.  He might ask me to do it over and over and over and over, seven times even.

Just as Naaman was commanded to submerge himself in the muddy waters of the Jordan (and in prideful response says the waters in Syria are much better than anything in Israel), not once, but seven times - trusting that this would lead to full restoration of his body, so God whispers to me:

"You don't understand this trial, but I do. 

You can't comprehend the why's, but I do. 

And that is enough."

Much deeper the roots go than just what the fruit shows and I have to trust Him enough to have the digging out, the pruning, the submerging in the unknown so that I might be fully restored.

What is easiest, having the magic wand waved, is not what is best and I will wash over and over in the incomprehensible trial of "now" so I might be fully ready for the "not yet."

Deuteronomy 31:6 Be strong and courageous. Do not be in fear of dread of them for the Lord your God is always with you. He will never leave you or forsake you.